Everyone's symptoms are different, but I thought I would share the symptoms I have!
Before the Panic attack:
Before a panic attack I get 'tummy aches' which consist of light 'butterflies' around my stomach, when I first started getting panic attacks my family and even I thought I had a stomach problem, acid tablets and lots of other medications were at the ready, but boy were we wrong! I sometimes even have feelings of sickness, even though these feelings are mainly physiological, they feel SO real!
During the dreaded panic attack:
When having a panic attack it's as though everything slows down, my hearing becomes more acute and everyone around me is an annoyance! (sorry to the boy I sit next too in maths!) - One time we had a GCSE the next lesson and I was in maths, the boy I sit next to was very concerned as I breathed in and out very slowly out of my mouth but to be frank all I wanted him to do was shut up and leave me alone! When having a panic attack people coming even an inch towards me just make me feel claustrophobic, weird hey!
Sometimes I still have these symptoms even if I'm not having a panic attack, they come nearly everyday for me mainly before I go to school or when I'm going to meet someone for even a coffee in town! Annoying but that's the way the cookie crumbles for me I guess!
What are your symptoms?
Thanks for reading, lots of love
Hannah xxx
Wednesday 29 February 2012
My Story: How I deal/delt with anxiety as a teenager!
Let's start with an introduction first!
Hello my name is Hannah, I am now nearly 16 years old (in a week - so exciting!) and
I've had quite a journey with anxiety! Let's start at the beginning!
Year 6 - I loved my primary school, I was a prefect and I looked after reception (putting their
coats on before and after school basically!) and loved every minute, I felt like I was part of their
community and enjoyed every moment of it, although by the end of year 6 I was ready for the
next step!
Year 7 - I had my hopes and dreams set on one particular school, So I get no stalkers let's call this 'school A' (there's a lot more schools to come in the story!) since about year 3 I had always wanted to go to this particular school and finally the day had come that I was a pupil there!
It was a Private catholic school and very strict! Year 7 was amazing, I made a lot of new friends and everything was just new and exciting, especially moving from class room to class room for lessons!
Year 8 - This is when things started to crumble a little, It was the middle of year 8 and I began going to the medical room a lot complaining of stomach aches and sickness, I would sit their for hours on end and after a month or so of going to the medical room my friends started to think I was very odd! I felt so alone. I then started to complain of stomach aches at home and always complained I didn't want to go to school. This was because I had been 'best friends' with a girl and our friendship was beginning to crumble also! She started to become mean towards me and I became more and more lonely and my anxiety began to grow. At the end of year 8 my world crumbled and I left 'school A'.
Year 9 - I had now joined a new school let's call this one 'School B' my mum thought maybe it was the school and I would be better in a new school, School B was a normal public school, all girls infact and although it wasn't the nicest I was already too unwell to even think about if I liked the school, I always felt hot and as though the walls were closing in on me, whenever I was like this I just wanted to go home, and mostly they wouldn't allow me so I sat with the learning mentor, she was lovely but all I wanted to do was escape! Whilst having panic attacks I would get bad stomach aches as I mentioned before which would lead me to needing the toilet a lot, which was also very emabarrasing! After 2 weeks of attending school B, I suddenly stopped going not because I was a naughty child or playing truant but because I was scared girl. The learning mentor would come over most days to try and chivvy me along to come to school, but I couldn't do it I would go into the corner and cry and shake like I was a mad women! To be honest I can't remember a lot of what happened it was like I was in a 'daze' a trance and no one could get me out of it. I eventually couldn't go to school, I was so scared of even stepping out of the house, I started to break off every friendship I had ever made, one by one and people didn't understand my mum would tell them what was going on but they just thought I was avoiding them, up until this day no one has ever understood!
Year 10 - I had now started home schooling and eventually went into a centre for 'sick people' with similar things such as depressing, anxiety etc. I had also been seeing a phyciatrist for the past few months, it was pretty depressing going their knowing I wasn't normal...unfortunately she didn't help..at all! Two things that mainly helped me on my journey were: My mum and my amazing home schooling teacher who was sent by the government to help me from the centre I later attended, she was amazing, her name was Sue and she helped me so much! I was very interested in crafts so in conjunction with the core subjects she would build my confidence and do little craft projects and step by step we would go to craft stores and craft tea shops. She was one amazing lady. My mum helped me every day, just getting out of bed was a task for me at this point in time, I was alone and felt as if nothing was worth living for, but my mum helped me through every day. Being a Christian also through prayer God also guided me and helped me everyday, but this is with thanks to my mum for guiding me to love God as much as I do today.
By the Novemeber of Year 10 I was ready to go back to school, so I joined School c, which I attend today.
Year 10 -11 - This was confidence building, I had been on a journey, from not going even outside my door or even talking with my friends I was now attending a school...a REAL school! It was a very small 'village' school, I went their mainly because I was becoming more and more lonely and ready to make friends, unfortunately what I didn't realise was how much of a 'village mentality' this school had, although it was a 'next step' and I felt it was the right step to make. Today I am in my final months of school, it is a relief to say this although I haven't made many friends at this current school I am thankful to say it has given my more confidence than I ever had! - One thing I have loved about this school however has been my head teacher, he is like no other and I feel by his gentle and kind manner he has given me the confidence and encouragement I have needed along side all my other great helps in my journey. Although I talk in past tense about my illness, I still take medication for it and still get Panic attacks now and again, although I have learnt to deal with them, my tummy aches have still continued but this is something that I am just going to have to learn to deal with every time I get them (which is every day I go to school!)
Next step - College, it's scary to think I will be going to such a big environment where I will know basically no one, but hopefully I will meet people who are going to be life long friends and that are going to understand me! By missing out on vital years of school I haven't made as many friends as I would of liked to, so hopefully College will open up some more doors to me in that aspect! fingers crossed ay!
So, that's my story, what's yours? - you can email me or leave your story in the comments.
Next Blog post: advice on dealing with anxiety!
Thanks for listening, lots of love
Hannah xxx
Hello my name is Hannah, I am now nearly 16 years old (in a week - so exciting!) and
I've had quite a journey with anxiety! Let's start at the beginning!
Year 6 - I loved my primary school, I was a prefect and I looked after reception (putting their
coats on before and after school basically!) and loved every minute, I felt like I was part of their
community and enjoyed every moment of it, although by the end of year 6 I was ready for the
next step!
Year 7 - I had my hopes and dreams set on one particular school, So I get no stalkers let's call this 'school A' (there's a lot more schools to come in the story!) since about year 3 I had always wanted to go to this particular school and finally the day had come that I was a pupil there!
It was a Private catholic school and very strict! Year 7 was amazing, I made a lot of new friends and everything was just new and exciting, especially moving from class room to class room for lessons!
Year 8 - This is when things started to crumble a little, It was the middle of year 8 and I began going to the medical room a lot complaining of stomach aches and sickness, I would sit their for hours on end and after a month or so of going to the medical room my friends started to think I was very odd! I felt so alone. I then started to complain of stomach aches at home and always complained I didn't want to go to school. This was because I had been 'best friends' with a girl and our friendship was beginning to crumble also! She started to become mean towards me and I became more and more lonely and my anxiety began to grow. At the end of year 8 my world crumbled and I left 'school A'.
Year 9 - I had now joined a new school let's call this one 'School B' my mum thought maybe it was the school and I would be better in a new school, School B was a normal public school, all girls infact and although it wasn't the nicest I was already too unwell to even think about if I liked the school, I always felt hot and as though the walls were closing in on me, whenever I was like this I just wanted to go home, and mostly they wouldn't allow me so I sat with the learning mentor, she was lovely but all I wanted to do was escape! Whilst having panic attacks I would get bad stomach aches as I mentioned before which would lead me to needing the toilet a lot, which was also very emabarrasing! After 2 weeks of attending school B, I suddenly stopped going not because I was a naughty child or playing truant but because I was scared girl. The learning mentor would come over most days to try and chivvy me along to come to school, but I couldn't do it I would go into the corner and cry and shake like I was a mad women! To be honest I can't remember a lot of what happened it was like I was in a 'daze' a trance and no one could get me out of it. I eventually couldn't go to school, I was so scared of even stepping out of the house, I started to break off every friendship I had ever made, one by one and people didn't understand my mum would tell them what was going on but they just thought I was avoiding them, up until this day no one has ever understood!
Year 10 - I had now started home schooling and eventually went into a centre for 'sick people' with similar things such as depressing, anxiety etc. I had also been seeing a phyciatrist for the past few months, it was pretty depressing going their knowing I wasn't normal...unfortunately she didn't help..at all! Two things that mainly helped me on my journey were: My mum and my amazing home schooling teacher who was sent by the government to help me from the centre I later attended, she was amazing, her name was Sue and she helped me so much! I was very interested in crafts so in conjunction with the core subjects she would build my confidence and do little craft projects and step by step we would go to craft stores and craft tea shops. She was one amazing lady. My mum helped me every day, just getting out of bed was a task for me at this point in time, I was alone and felt as if nothing was worth living for, but my mum helped me through every day. Being a Christian also through prayer God also guided me and helped me everyday, but this is with thanks to my mum for guiding me to love God as much as I do today.
By the Novemeber of Year 10 I was ready to go back to school, so I joined School c, which I attend today.
Year 10 -11 - This was confidence building, I had been on a journey, from not going even outside my door or even talking with my friends I was now attending a school...a REAL school! It was a very small 'village' school, I went their mainly because I was becoming more and more lonely and ready to make friends, unfortunately what I didn't realise was how much of a 'village mentality' this school had, although it was a 'next step' and I felt it was the right step to make. Today I am in my final months of school, it is a relief to say this although I haven't made many friends at this current school I am thankful to say it has given my more confidence than I ever had! - One thing I have loved about this school however has been my head teacher, he is like no other and I feel by his gentle and kind manner he has given me the confidence and encouragement I have needed along side all my other great helps in my journey. Although I talk in past tense about my illness, I still take medication for it and still get Panic attacks now and again, although I have learnt to deal with them, my tummy aches have still continued but this is something that I am just going to have to learn to deal with every time I get them (which is every day I go to school!)
Next step - College, it's scary to think I will be going to such a big environment where I will know basically no one, but hopefully I will meet people who are going to be life long friends and that are going to understand me! By missing out on vital years of school I haven't made as many friends as I would of liked to, so hopefully College will open up some more doors to me in that aspect! fingers crossed ay!
So, that's my story, what's yours? - you can email me or leave your story in the comments.
Next Blog post: advice on dealing with anxiety!
Thanks for listening, lots of love
Hannah xxx
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